Tuesday, September 23, 2008

My Rant

I was just over at Making Home reading a very good post. It's about birth control. I personally don't have a problem with birth controll and believe that it's a personal decision between husband, wife, and God. However, the post put me in mind of something I've wanted to write about for some time. Professionalism seems to be a thing of the past. Everywhere you go people are just plain rude/and/or take liberties with how they treat others. I constantly hear complaints about how unprofessinal somebody was. I continually see unprofessional behavior everywhere I go. Society today is all too familiar. When I was a girl, children referred to adults outside of their families as Mr. Mrs. or Miss (that was before Ms). I would never have considered calling a friend of my mother by her first name. Nowadays children call adults by thier first names and don't even consider using a title. At businesses people no longer are respectful and kind. Instead they are rude as if they are doing you a favor for being there instead of you doing them the honor of using their business. People on the street assume they can and should address others by thier first names without asking. Nurses in the hospital address patients by their first name without permission. Patients insist on calling nurses by their first name. Doctors call everyone by thier first name but then insist on being addressed as "doctor". That is so wrong. If you want to be called by your title then you must refer to others by their title unless they ask you to use their first name. I feel that if we as a society would go back to addressing each other with respect a lot of the disrespect out there would go away, and a lot of the inappropriate conversations out there would stop. People you don't know or don't know well will ask you if you're husband is good in bed. Co workers tell you intimate bedroom details as if you wanted to know or talk about their many conquests publicly. Whatever happened to a lady/gentleman doesn't kiss and tell? If you have more than 2 children people tell you to stop it or ask you if you haven't figured out how that happens yet. If you have one child people ask you if you're having another and when. If you don't have children and you've been married more than a year people want to know when you are starting your family or what you're waiting for. If the person anwers that personal question indicating that they are trying or they do want kids they get bombarded with even more personal and completely rude questions about their sex life, positions, etc. Honestly! I have struggled with infertility and people ask me if it's me or him. If we are having enough sex. What positions are we using. Have we tried this or that. Are we going to try this or that. I have had complete and total strangers ask me things like this. I had one lady I had only just met who discovered Alaina is adopted say, "Why? Can't you have your own?" And she said that as if adoption is a lesser choice. My question to the nosy people is this. How is anyone else's family life any of your business? We have already had odd looks as we are raising our daughter to call our friends Mr. or Mrs. etc. calling a non family adult by their first name is not an option for her. She is also going to be learning insanity like yes sir and yes ma'am, and may I be excused. We apparently have lost our minds. I have always called my patients Mr. or Mrs. I do not allow a doctor to call me by my first name if I may not call him or her by his or her first name. If he asks may I call you Rebecca? I say sure if I can call you Fred or whatever the name might be. They might be a doctor, but that doesn't mean they derserve more respect as a person than I do. The same goes for a first meeting with a new GYN. He can meet me for the first time with my clothes on or he can choose to take his off and put a paper robe on and meet me that way. The same with ministers. If you call me by my first name expect me to call you by your first name and not pastor so and so. I had a pastor and his wife that I loved dearly, but they drove me nuts as they demanded to be called pastor and sister so and so while calling me and my husband by our first names. The pastor even told everyone from the pulpit that we are not allowed to use his wife's first name as she deserved our respect. I respected her very much and still do, but I do not agree with people holding themselves up as deserving more respect than others. I am an army wife. I refer to everyone by their title unless asked to do differently. If Col. so and so wants to call me Rebecca he had better expect to be called Jim. Otherwise he can call me Mrs. P. and I will call him Col. so and so. The same would go with president Bush. I will call him President Bush and he will call me Mrs. P. or it can be George and Rebecca. There, I've had my say.


Dawn said...

Your rant was awesome! :)

There seriously is a lack of respect everywhere we go. Sometimes I have to make sure my mouth isn't gaping open at the stuff I see and hear.

Everything you wrote about we have all seen it, heard it, been a part of it.

The world doesn't seem to have any shame anymore. Any decensy (sp?) or modesty (not talking about clothing) about how they carry themselves.

Everything seems to be wide open. Nothing is kept private anymore even though it should be. And the Internet doesn't help to keep the privacy and innocency of folks anymore. : /

Oh my goodness and isn't it true people are so nosy about your personal sex life.
My husband's family sure likes to bring up in every phone conversation 'when are you going to have a baby?'. Every time! I have stopped answering the phone because of that as I got tired of having to explain myself to them. Why do I even have to answer to them anyways? It's none of their business what me and my husband do.
I don't ask what goes on in their bedrooms or how fertile or unfertile they are.
I don't ask what type of birth control they use or why they are shacking up with men they aren't married too.

There's a line to draw when it comes to intimate issues. Intimate issues are between the husband, wife and God, not co-workers, bloggers, neighbors, and MySpace friends!

I guess we are just old fashioned Rebecca and 'need to get with the times'....NOT!

I think I will do my best to mind my manners and not go with the flow of the world's way of doing things.

P.S. I haven't been on your blog on forever! I had updated my blog with a new template and it deleted all my links and I couldn't remember whose blogs I used to read. Yours came to mind eventually. :)

P.S.S. Hubby and I left Germany July 4th and have now settled in Texas. Germany feels like a distant memory, it's a weird feeling actually. :)

God Bless You!

Pam said...

You should feel better after that!


Well, I know that made you feel so much better getting that off your heart.

As I was reading your post, I glanced down and saw where you had asked prayer for me during the hurricane. That blessed my heart beyone measure, Rebecca, thank you so much. I do believe that it was because fo so many people praying that God moved the hurricane enough away from us that we only had minimal damage. We are so thankful!!! Thank you so much for praying for us. I came over here to be a blessing to you and now I feel so blest. my heart runneth over with joy. love you, connie

Rebecca said...

It did make me feel better thank you. We are just so glad that you and yours are ok Connie.

Civilla said...

Hi! Great post. My husband is retired from the Air Force. Yes, when we were young, you NEVER called adults by their first names. Where we are from, close friends of your parents were called "Aunt" or "Uncle" So-and-So (with their permission, of course) if Mr. and Mrs. seemed to formal. Everybody else was Mr. and Mrs.

My husband is a pastor. Everybody just calls him by his first name. We think this is disrespectful, but have given up even trying to get people to call him "Pastor." The small children do it, and their parents don't correct them, because they do it, too.

And, you are right about the rude questions about just about everything. We have no manners any more. Sad to say.

Rebecca said...

Nice to meet you Civilla! I just checked out your blog and I like it. I'll be visiting as time allows.